Baby, You're Hilarious!

Some oldies from my in-box. Aunt Johnnie was busy!!!

My favorite? That last one. I think that was the look on my little niece's face just this morning!!! LOL

Peace
--Free

Living for the "Slow" Life

**From my in-box**

After Christmas vacation, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holiday away from school.  One child wrote the following:


We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa.

They used to live in a big brick house but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Stay-young Bay in Florida where everyone lives in nice little houses, and so they don't have to mow the grass anymore!
They ride around on their bicycles and scooters and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore.

They go to a building called a wreck center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all okay now.
They do exercises there, but they don't do them very well.  

There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on.

At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it.

He watches all day so nobody can ESCAPE.

Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts!

Nobody there cooks, they just eat out.

And, they eat the same thing every night - early birds.  Some of the people can't get out past the man in the doll house.

The ones who do get out, bring food back to the wrecked center for pot luck.

My Grandma says that Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too.  

When I earn my retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house.  Then I will let people out, so they can visit their grandchildren.

Hahahaha!!!

Peace

--Free

Humorously Elderly

Peace
--Free

Olden and Golden

          And, finally, my favorite one.....

Peace
--Free

Kids... At Church and Home

It's been too long since I've updated this blog! I decided to try getting over here more often because, during this election season, the good Lord knows we all need some laughter...
These are the latest bits from my email inbox. Please enjoy. (And thanks, Auntie Johnnie!)

                                                             
Three-year-old Reese prayed: Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name.  Amen.
                                             
A little boy was overheard praying: Lord, if you can't make me a better boy don't worry about it. I'm having a real GOOD time like I am.

                                                  
After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.  His father asked him three times what was wrong.

Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home. But I wanna stay with you guys."
                                                           

A four-year-old’s prayer: And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets.
                                                           

A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service: "And why is it necessary to be QUIET in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping!"
                                                                    
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.

"If Jesus was sitting here, He would say: 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.' "
Kevin turned to his younger brother and said: "Ryan, you be Jesus!"

                                                  

A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand and led him to the shore and showed him a dead seagull in the sand. he asked, "Daddy, what happened to him?"

Dad replied, "He died and went to Heaven."

After a moment of thought, the boy said: "Did God throw him back down?"

                                                   

A wife invited some people to dinner.  At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?"

"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.

"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.

The little girl bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"

Peace
--Free

Random & Funny (photos)

Time for some smiles, people... Right out of my in-box:

Not all men. Just the ones I know

This one is just for my niece & her dog Twilight

I'm going to use this for any family leaving the kids longer than I agreed to!

Funny now, but one day, we'll be the "grandma"

Under the kitchen sink. Yes, ma'am

And my favorite?

Be mad all you want, I laughed!

Peace
--Free