Oh, Miss Maxine! You a Mess!

(Oh, how I do love Miss Maxine! Thanks Auntie J!)

• "The only thing I stir up in the kitchen is trouble."
• "I hate housework! You make the beds, do the dishes and 6 months later you have to do it all over again!!"
• "I read recipes the way I read science fiction - I get to the end and think 'Well, that's not gonna happen!'"
• "Recipes are like a dating service. They never end up looking like the picture."
• "There should be a support group for women who can't put their dishes in the dishwasher dirty."
• "I love a good meal! So I don't cook."
• "A household hint: Stop dusting and you can use your coffee table as a message board."
• "Smoke detectors need to be tested from time to time. So sometimes I cook something."
• "They lied. Hard work has killed lots of people."
• "I find it helps to organize chores into categories: Things I won't do now; Things I won't do later; Things I'll never do…"
• "Honk if you love Jesus. Text while driving if you want to meet Him."