7 Reasons Not To Mess With Children
A little girl was talking with her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because, even though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small.
The little girl state that Jonah was swallowed by a whale
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven, I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
A little girl was talking with her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because, even though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small.
The little girl state that Jonah was swallowed by a whale
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven, I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
***
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her class while they were drawing. She would walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat or looking away from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat or looking away from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
***
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" they father and mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
***
One day, a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought aout this revelation for a while, then said, "Mommy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought aout this revelation for a while, then said, "Mommy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
***
The children had all been photographed and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer now,' or 'That's Michael, he's a doctor now.'"
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, shes' dead now."
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer now,' or 'That's Michael, he's a doctor now.'"
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, shes' dead now."
***
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing in the upright position, the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty!"
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing in the upright position, the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty!"
***
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note and posted it on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE. God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples.'
(You gotta love kids!)
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples.'
(You gotta love kids!)
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